By Fr Nick de Groot SVD
The “Synod on the Family” this coming October 2015 will highlight, no doubt, the sharp differences among Catholics over moral issues. To use a quote from Fr Daniel O’Leary from the Tablet, “While the Church prays for peace between nations, its own members are often bitterly stuck in a deadening clericalism and adherence to rules.” It comes from an article he wrote under the title, Dialogue and Dissent.
As I followed the various news items in the Tablet and other media the last couple of months, I was disturbed by the entrenched positions that were already taken by various high ranking people about the issues on the family that are meant to be discussed at the Synod. And I ask myself, where is the dialogue, where is the listening, where is the openness that is necessary for true dialogue? I did some more digging and found some interesting reflections on the meaning of dialogue.
“Dialogue is focused conversation, engaged in intentionally with the goal of increasing understanding, addressing problems, and questioning thoughts and actions. It engages the heart as well as the mind. It is different from ordinary, everyday conversation in that dialogue has a focus and a purpose.... Dialogue, unlike debate or even discussion, is as interested in the relationship(s) between the participants (Lay-people?) as it is in the topic or theme being explored. Ultimately, real dialogue presupposes an openness to modify deeply held convictions. The raising of questions, what I have called elsewhere, the spirit of wonder, is a sine qua non of dialogue. Living in the questions is a good place to begin.” (Patricia Romney, The Art of Dialogue)
Dialogue is a conversation with a centre, not sides. It is a way of taking the energy of our differences and channelling it toward something that has never been created before. It lifts us out of polarization and into a greater common sense, and is thereby a means for accessing the intelligence and coordinated power of groups of people.
The roots of the word dialogue come from the Greek words dia and logos . Dia meaning 'through'; logos translates to 'word' or 'meaning'. In essence, a dialogue is a flow of meaning. But it is more than this too. In the most ancient meaning of the word, logos meant 'to gather together', and suggested an intimate awareness of the relationships among things in the natural world. In that sense, logos may be best rendered in English as 'relationship'. The Book of John in the New Testament begins: "In the beginning was the Word ( logos )". We could now hear this as: "In the beginning was the Relationship."
To take it one step further, dialogue is a conversation in which people think together in relationship. Thinking together implies that you no longer take your own position as final. You relax your grip on certainty and listen to possibilities that result simply from being in relationship with others as possibilities that might not otherwise have occurred.
To listen respectfully to others, to cultivate and speak your own voice, to suspend your opinions about others—these bring out the intelligence that lives at the very centre of ourselves (Is that what we call the Holy Spirit?) I hope Dialogue is part of my everyday food. “Give us this day our daily bread . . . .”
